Planning a memorial service can be both a difficult yet fulfilling task as you honor the life and memory of someone who has passed away. Putting together a meaningful memorial takes time, thought, and care. While each service will look different based on the deceased individual’s life and your family or community’s preferences and customs, having samples to guide the overall structure and content can be helpful. Here are some samples and suggestions to consider when writing and planning a memorial service:
Opening Greeting and Welcome (500-1000 words)
A short welcome at the beginning helps gather everyone’s attention and sets the tone for remembrance. You may choose to briefly introduce yourself, thank people for being present to honor the deceased, and make any opening remarks that feel fitting such as sharing a short memory, prayer, or reading. For example:
“Good afternoon. Thank you all for being here today as we celebrate the life of [name]. For those who didn’t know me, my name is [your name] and I was [your relationship to them]. I’m so grateful we can come together to honor [name]’s memory. They touched so many lives and brought so much joy. As we gather here in their remembrance, I ask that we take a moment of silence to reflect on how they impacted us.” [ brief moment of silence] “Thank you. Now let us begin.”
Eulogy/Reflections (1000-2500 words)
The primary focus of the memorial service is often sharing stories, memories, reflections about the person who passed. Multiple people could be asked to participate or one main speaker. Some key points that may be addressed:
Background on their life – where they were born and grew up, family, education/career highlights
Favorite memories, stories, and anecdotes that capture their personality and character
How they impacted and touched those who knew them – what they will be remembered for
Things that brought them the most joy in life – hobbies, passions, people
Lessons learned from them or how they inspire you still
What you’ll miss the most as you remember them
A few words about their legacy and how they will live on
For example:
“Growing up, [name] loved nothing more than being out on the baseball field with all the neighborhood kids. They were everyone’s biggest cheerleader and the life of the party even when their team wasn’t winning. I can still hear their contagious laugh echoing through the streets. Baseball was really their first passion that taught them the value of teamwork, leadership, and never giving up – qualities they would carry with them throughout their remarkable life.”
“As a teacher, [name] showed up each day with endless patience, creativity and care for every student. They saw potential in each child and brought out the best in them. Their class was a place where all felt welcomed, supported and excited to learn. Countless lives were shaped and inspired by [name’s] gift for bringing out the light in others.”
Music/Multimedia (500-1000 words)
Incorporating music, photos or videos can add meaningful elements that help honor the person being remembered. It’s a nice way to break up sections of speaking as well. Some options to consider including:
-1-2 special songs that were favorites of the deceased, played live or on a playlist
-A short slideshow of photos from their life set to soft instrumental music
-A video compilation of home videos and pictures with background music
-Having family/friends say a few words about what each song/item means to their memory
For example:
“This next piece of music was [name’s] favorite. Whenever it came on, they would insist everyone stop what they were doing to dance. I’m sure they’d want us dancing with them in spirit today.”
[PLAY SONG AS SLIDESHOW PLAYS]
“As you see in these photos, [name’s] grandchildren were the light of their life. I know they are watching over them with so much love and pride always.”
Readings/Poems (500-1000 words)
Incorporating readings, whether from scripture or secular literature, can be a meaningful way to help provide wisdom, comfort or inspiration during a time of loss. Having the reading’s significance explained can add more depth. Having multiple short readings is usually better than one long selection. Some options could include:
A prayer, psalm or Bible verse that was significant to the deceased or their faith
A poem about remembrance, grief or the afterlife that captures the feelings of loss
An excerpt from their favorite book or work that reflected their outlook
Having someone close read something written for the occasion
For example:
“This next reading always gave [name] hope and strength. It reminds us that even in our darkest moments, light and beauty can be found.”
[HAVE SOMEONE READ SELECTION]
Acknowledgements (250-500 words)
Thank anyone who helped make the service possible – people involved in planning, church/venue staff, caterers, musicians, or anyone who offered support to the family. You can also acknowledge donations made in their memory if applicable. This is a nice way to recognize all those who played a role.
Closing Remarks (250-500 words)
Express gratitude again for all who attended to honor the individual’s life. Share a final message of hope, comfort, or the deceased’s outlook if it seems fitting. You can also provide details on any gathering/refreshments following or note where people can leave written remembrances/flowers. A final prayer or wish for those grieving can bring closure.
For example:
“Thank you all for being part of [name’s] celebration of life today. I know they felt so loved being surrounded by all of you. As we go from here, may we carry with us the lessons of [name’s] kindness/joy/strength and pass them on to others. Please join us next door for fellowship. And for [name’s] family and friends grieving the deepest, may you find peace in your memories and their spirit that lives on in each of our hearts. Go in peace.”
Closing Song (optional)
Having one last uplifting or meaningful song as guests depart can provide a moving conclusion if desired. Keeping the overall structure, content and delivery concise yet heartfelt will help honor the person’s memory while also bringing comfort during a difficult time. With preparation and personalization, a beautiful memorial service can celebrate a life well lived.
Andrew Stroud