The State of Texas Assessments of Academic Readiness (STAAR) tests are standardized tests used in Texas public primary and secondary schools to assess students’ attainment of reading, writing, math, science, and social studies skills required under Texas education standards. One component of the STAAR tests is the writing assessment, where students are required to complete essays in response to given prompts. Sample essays are important resources for students, parents, and educators to understand what constitutes a high-scoring response on the STAAR writing test. This article will analyze several actual student essays that received high scores on past STAAR writing assessments to provide models that can help guide writing instruction and preparation.
The STAAR writing test consists of one multi-paragraph composition in which students must “effectively develop a thesis to address the specific requirements of the prompt and purpose, including consideration of the audience and context.” Scoring is done by trained evaluators based on four domains – purpose/focus, organization, development of ideas, and usage/mechanics. Responses are scored on a scale of 1-4, with 1 being “inadequate,” 2 being “marginal,” 3 being “satisfactory,” and 4 being “exceptional.” The target for students is a score of 3, or “satisfactory.” Let’s examine some 4th grade STAAR writing samples that received ratings of 3 or 4 to analyze their strengths.
A 4th grade prompt asked students to write an essay convincing classmates why reading is important. A level 4 response opened with an engaging introductory paragraph:
“Reading is one of the most important skills a person can have. When you read, you open your mind up to whole new worlds and adventures right in the pages of a book. But reading is also practical – it can help you do better in school and get a good job one day. I’m going to explain why reading is so important and try to convince you all how reading can really help in life.”
This clear, focused introduction establishes the thesis that reading is important for enjoyment, school success, and career opportunities. The next paragraphs effectively develop each point with specific examples and reasons:
“When you read stories, it’s like going on exciting journeys without ever leaving your house. Have you ever read about climbing a big mountain or exploring a lost jungle? Books let your imagination run wild. I just finished a book about gorillas in Africa and it felt like I was right there with them! Reading can take your mind anywhere and expose you to places and experiences you may never get to otherwise. It’s entertaining and educational.”
“Reading is also very useful for doing well in school. All your classes like science, social studies and English require reading textbooks, articles and assignments. If you’re not a strong reader, it will be very hard to understand what you’re supposed to learn. Good readers also do better on standardized tests like the STAAR. The more you read, the smarter you’ll get and the better student you’ll be.”
“When you graduate high school and need to get a job, reading skills will serve you well no matter what career you choose. Many jobs involve reading complicated manuals, reports or documents. Others like being a doctor or lawyer require years of advanced reading in college. Employers want workers who can read efficiently to get their work done. So reading now will help you be successful and have more opportunities later in life.”
The conclusion sums up the key points neatly:
“Reading provides enjoyment through imagination and travel to different places, helps academic success in all subjects, and benefits your future career. I hope I’ve convinced you that spending time with books is important and worthwhile. Reading really does open doors to fun adventures, learning, and achievement. Get reading!”
This response scored a level 4 due to its clear, focused thesis and organizational structure. Each body paragraph effectively develops one reason reading is important with well-chosen examples and details. Transitions between ideas are smooth and the conclusion restates the main point concisely. Writing mechanics are error-free, enhancing the coherence and fluency. Overall, it provides an excellent model for a high-scoring STAAR essay.
For another 4th grade prompt asking students to write about overcoming a challenge, one essay that scored a 3 analyzed a personal experience:
“Last summer, I signed up for swim lessons even though I was really scared of the water. I had never learned how to swim and was afraid of going underwater. But I knew it was an important skill to learn, so I decided to face my fear. At first, just putting my face in was really hard. I would panic and quickly come up gasping for air. My teacher was patient and encouraging, telling me I could do it.”
This opening paragraph sets up an engaging anecdote and establishes the challenge of learning to swim despite a fear of water. The next paragraphs proceed to narrate overcoming the challenge through perseverance and practice:
“During each lesson, I practiced floating on my back and blowing bubbles out of my mouth so I could breathe underwater. Slowly but surely, I got more comfortable being in the water. After a few weeks, I amazed myself by swimming all the way across the shallow end of the pool without stopping! My family was so proud when they came to watch my lesson. I was proud of myself, too, for facing something scary and not giving up.”
“By the end of the summer, I had learned all the basic strokes and could swim one length of the big pool. My teacher said I worked really hard and should feel accomplished. She was right – overcoming my fear of water and learning to swim took a lot of courage and effort. But I’m glad I stuck with it, because now I feel confident in the water and excited to keep improving my skills.”
The conclusion ties the anecdote back to the larger theme of overcoming challenges:
“Facing challenges isn’t always easy, but having the determination to try new things and not quit when things get tough makes you a stronger person. Learning to swim taught me that with practice and perseverance, I am capable of accomplishing more than I once thought possible. I know that lesson will help me in taking on future challenges, too.”
The incorporation of a detailed personal experience conveyed the message more effectively than general statements could have. Transitions linked ideas smoothly and language was descriptive yet controlled. Minor usage errors did not detract substantially from the quality of writing, resulting in an overall successful “satisfactory” response. This sample provides a good model for a level 3 essay on this topic.
To analyze a high school prompt, one 11th grade example that scored a level 4 addressed this prompt: “Explain how focusing outward – on others rather than ourselves – can lead to personal growth and fulfillment.”
The opening paragraph sets up an intriguing thesis:
“While focusing inwardly on ourselves and our own wants/needs seems like it would lead to happiness and contentment, research and life experiences show the opposite is actually true. Concentrating too much on ourselves isolates us from meaningful connections with other people and prevents us from expanding our perspectives and potentials. I will explain how redirecting our attention outwardly onto others can cultivate personal development and an increased sense of purpose and well-being.”
Each body paragraph then explores a different aspect of how focusing outwardly benefits personal development:
“Giving of our time and talents to help those around us strengthens our communities and fosters empathy, two characteristics that are satisfying on their own. But volunteering also provides learning experiences we could never gain otherwise as we are exposed to diverse people and circumstances outside our usual routines. These new understandings can spark insights and even career directions we did not previously envision.”
“Caring about others’ lives beyond our immediate circles through acts of compassion widens our worldviews and enhances our appreciate for humanity’s shared hopes and hardships. Walking in another’s shoes, even if just for a little while through listening to their stories, instills humility and perspective about life’s true priorities. A softened, less judgmental outlook tends to correlate with increased contentment.”
“Healthy relationships require selflessness as much as taking. Making an extra effort to understand differing viewpoints, celebrate accomplishments that do not directly involve us, and provide support without expectation of return allows fulfilling bonds to form. Strong social bonds have been proven to boost overall wellness and longevity through difficult seasons of life.”
The conclusion calls the reader to reflective action:
“In closing, focusing inward perpetuates notions of scarcity and isolation, but redirecting concern outwardly onto others cultivates abundance, purpose and reward in both giving and receiving. I encourage actively exploring ways to step outside self-interest for personal and community benefit through compassionate engagement.”
Flawless language control and a sophisticated yet accessible writing style elevated this response. Thoughtful analysis of multiple perspectives on the prompt’s complex thesis demonstrated a nuanced understanding. As a result, this exemplar paper achieved the exceptional level 4 score.
In examining these exemplar STAAR essays across multiple grades, some common strengths emerge among high-scoring responses:
Clear, focused theses that directly address the prompt
Logical organizational structure to Develop ideas
Thorough yet concise development of all points with well-chosen examples
Smooth transitions between and within paragraphs
Engaging introduction and conclusion that bookend the discussion
Varied yet controlled sentence structure and vocabulary
Careful proofreading to avoid mechanics errors
Persuasive style appropriate to context and development of perspective
Studying sample responses helps identify what high-level expectations are for different grade levels. While personal experiences may differ, these exemplars demonstrate compositional
Andrew Stroud